He said I'm jealous of her. He thinks I'm jealous because he pays more intention to her instead of me. I just don't understand, how come I still get affected when a situation like this comes up. I'd be alive at first and then suddenly I think hard about it and I end up being sad...even lonely. I already moved on!! I just can't be..why am I even feeling this. I already thought of tons of negative things about him to make me not-like-him anymore, but I guess it didn't work. I catch myself thinking about him. I even had a dream about him! You know what's weird? My friend Inna gave me a dreamcatcher, it said on the paper that sometimes whatever you dream (when you put it up) may came true or is a good dream. The thing is, when I put it up I didn't have any dreams for weeks and now all of a sudden. I dreamt of him, in a beach with me.

and it's a good dream?

I even checked that bloody dream catcher if it's broken or something but it was A-OK.

"These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase"

"I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along"


die, you must die v_ _ _ _.
because you made me like you.

because of you i feel so miserable
because of you i feel so lonely
because of you i'm hurt
because of you i may be jealous
because of you i don't feel so happy anymore

so maybe you do mean something to me. but i'm gonna have to try to make you mean nothing to me. because i just get hurt, and that's unfair. you always think i'm joking because you always see my laughing or smiling. But now i'm serious. I don't want to see you anymore because


I


HATE


YOU

Kiko got scolded by mom, because he was messing with J.P.
which of course was reallly stupid. since john wasn't doing anything to him in the first place. and then he texted david (using my phone) saying: "i love you sugarpuff" luckily i was able to tell david that wasn't me before the even recieved it.

what else? i watched my favorite C.S.I. episode today which was the 3rd to the last episode of season three. entitled: forever. I like the whole romeo & juliet concept..really really nice.

my whole weekend was trash. after the whole ash creek thing nung friday my throat is once again dry and i get head aches once in a while some crappy motion sickness thing. i'm excited to go to training on tuesday. and next week (LT week) we wouldn't have any training since :

a) we have LT

b) they're setting up for the fair

whoopee can't wait.

starting tomorrow i will isolate myself from the rubbermaids (insert trademark sign here). Anyways, I'm planning to sleep before 10:30 and it's now 10:26 so i guess i gotta go.

must..see.him..on..tuesday.....

>_<

GAMBLING

-is for losers who think it's easy money. dude, you need a reality check if you gamble. Can you count how many people became poor because of that sick addiction? Anyways, I was watching MGB with my mom, my dad and aleks. When then they suddenly aired this part wherein the crew of MGB saw something disturbing. 5 coffins, inside were all dead bodies of female humans (a mom and 4 daughters) as it trurned out. The dad just lost in a cockfight and then his wife was asking him stuff, which led into a fight (pia, take note that the wife kicked the husband by the crotch) and then the guy started stabbing the girl. Then he saw his four daughters and started stabbing them too. GOD, please bless their souls. I saw the bodies and was shocked to see the children's bodies. They had knife wounds in their faces. poor kids. bad father. at least hey were put to justice in some way.

GOD, PLEASE PLEASE BLESS THEIR SOULS!

i'm going to rockwell later with my friends later.


*YIPEE!!!!*